i found in my pursuit of God that He was much more hotly in pursuit of me.

Friday, March 31, 2006

to tell the truth, part deux

One of the following stories is true. Let's just see how easily you are fooled, this fine April Fool's day. Post your guesses as comments. And I promise, one story is one hundred percent true.

El Story-oh Numero Uno - When I was 18, I got myself totally addicted to the KWJJ night-time radio show called "Cryin' Lovin' or Leavin.'" Addicted to the point of obsession. I could not wait for it to come on each night. The people who would call would be ridiculous. The DJ would say "Cryin' Lovin or Leavin'?" and the saps on the line would say something like "I'm cryin', I just lost my job and came home and found out my dog got runned over by mah next door neighbor." Then they'd request some fitting song, cause as we all know, there's a song for everything if you just dial in a country station. So anyway... I wanted to call in. I wanted to call in so hard. So I made up a character. Her name was Darlene, and I called in and said "Mah name is Dahr-Leen, Ah'm a cook down at the Happy Burger on 82nd and Ah'm Cryin' Lovin' AND Leavin'! When Ah got home to the tray-ler after work, Ah found a lipstick an it wusn't mahn! So Ah love 'im but Ah'm leavin' 'im cause Ah can't stop cryin!" Well, the DJ fell for it, and we settled on the song "Did you tell her she was sleepin' in the bed you made for me." The DJ liked Darlene so much, that I became a bit of character on the show. Imagine his surprise when I finally met him in person and I was just an 18 year old goofing around.

El Story-oh Numero Dos - In my sophomorere year of highschool, I found out that Wheel of Fortune was having highschool week and I was fairly desperate to go. So me and my friend Wade got into his sincerely boss orange Datsun 210 and headed to California to try out. It was going to be a lottery. Fill out a simple application, then they would draw from a pool of eligible contestants based on the application. We figured it was only one days drive down, and maybe we'd win some money. The problem was, it wasn't spring break or anything, and our parents never would have let us go. We snuck out at around 2:30 in the morning, left notes on the counter, panicked somewhere near Salem, had breakfast at a greasy spoon and were back home before they knew we were gone.

El Story-oh Numero Tres - When I was in grade eight, I was taking a speech class (Mr. Roberts, for any locals). I honestly don't remember what my end of the semester five minute speech was about, but I do remember what happened to me during the speech. I was nearly done, and suddenly I felt some pretty major, uhm, stomach upset. There was air needing to escape. Now keep in mind, I am a fairly private person. To this day, I don't let that particular function happen in front of the mister. So I figured if I, er, squeezed as hard as I could, I could prevent the air from escaping until I could make it to the ladies between classes. Well, I don't know if any of you have ever tried that method, but let me tell you, it does not work. The air escaped, and to my best recollection, it was ten times louder and higher pitched than it would have been had I just relaxed. And yes, everyone heard, and yes, I still hear about it from my classmates when we see each other.

So there you go... voting is now open. I'll post the answer one day next week. Have fun!

arrivederci, rebecca marie

Thursday, March 30, 2006

watch for it...

'member this game? well, i'm fixin' to do it again for april fools day. hooray.

arrivederci, rebecca marie

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Take me now, Lord, I can't take anymore.

Ever have one of those experiences that you think you won't recover from? This one time, in grade twelve, I had a madly innapropriate crush on a teacher. It was exhilerating and humiliating all at the same time. It wasn't to the point that I had fantasies of him quiting his job to run off with me, but it was close.

He was one of those very available teachers. He was just always around. He'd be in the college library that we'd study in. He'd be in the cafeteria at lunch time. He'd be at all of the games. He was just cool like that. Very visible.

Well one day, we were standing together watching a soccer game and I noticed some gum on the ground. The dialogue went as follows:

Rebecca Marie - Look at that gum.

Hot Teacher - Yeah, people are rude.

RM - Do you suppose gum ever bio-degrades?

HT - No, I think it pretty much stays around forever.

RM - What if you swallow it? Do you think your body processes it and makes it go away?

HT - No, I'd bet it just passes through. Like peanuts.

Yeah, you heard me right. The teacher I had a raging crush on was engaging me in a conversation about the contents of poop.

arrivederci, rebecca marie

Saturday, March 11, 2006

new quiz. aren't you just happy happy


arrivederci, rebecca marie

Tuesday, March 07, 2006


arrivederci, rebecca marie