dear boy child
was the nine months of pregnancy comprised of the following:
TWENTY weeks of non-stop hiccups
heartburn
stretch marks from the pubic region (yes, i said pubic) to the rib cage
all day (not morning) sickness for all nine months
toxemia
preeclampsia
blood pressure at 189/101
throwing up through all 23 hours of labour
an emergency cesarian
three blood transfusions
not enough for you?
why did you have to successfully complete the worlds splashiest technicolour yawn from your top bunk last night?
no, you do not get extra points for hitting the pile of legos on the floor. nor do you get extra points for having consumed sausage, hashbrowns and a cucumber during the day.
sometimes, rubber gloves are not quite enough to keep me from toppling over the brink of sanity.
arrivederci, rebecca marie
p.s. on an unrelated note... can we all make a pact to not take too many drugs and then try to fix the damage with bad plastic surgery? oh mickey, you're not so fine, but you absolutely blow my mind.
TWENTY weeks of non-stop hiccups
heartburn
stretch marks from the pubic region (yes, i said pubic) to the rib cage
all day (not morning) sickness for all nine months
toxemia
preeclampsia
blood pressure at 189/101
throwing up through all 23 hours of labour
an emergency cesarian
three blood transfusions
not enough for you?
why did you have to successfully complete the worlds splashiest technicolour yawn from your top bunk last night?
no, you do not get extra points for hitting the pile of legos on the floor. nor do you get extra points for having consumed sausage, hashbrowns and a cucumber during the day.
sometimes, rubber gloves are not quite enough to keep me from toppling over the brink of sanity.
arrivederci, rebecca marie
p.s. on an unrelated note... can we all make a pact to not take too many drugs and then try to fix the damage with bad plastic surgery? oh mickey, you're not so fine, but you absolutely blow my mind.
proclaimed by rebecca marie at 8:51 AM
17 flattering compliments:
eeewwww!!!!! everyone's children are vomiting it seems! my friend's 3 year old is technicolor yawning all over her house, i had a kid projectile vomit in my class on sunday . . . ew! ew! ew!
i feel for you. i really do.
this is the thing i do not look forward to in parenthood.
plus, when i lived at home, one of my sisters decided it would be a good idea to throw up in the SINK instead of the toiley. the SINK. of course it clogged and wouldn't go down. and splashed all over.
we had to plunge it.
gross.
When I was a teeny infant baby I would projectile vomit all the time. Wasn't that super sweet of me?
Mwah ha ha! (Evil laugh.)
Eww, legos.
Eeeewwwwww! re: the speeyaking, AND scary plastic Mickey.
Man, if my pregancy had any resemblance to yours, I'd definitely be having an only child.
yeah.... Little Miss seems to have a daughter with stuff coming from everywhere. Makes for a great post, but sad, sad, version of birth control...
and the sausage part made me throw up in my mouth... a little bit more.
The nastiest thing of all is that if it would have only been a little vomit and in her own bed RM might have slept in it just to get a little sleep...or is that me? My son vomits milk junk when it is bed time just about every night. (Crying mixed with snott, a bad combo for the wind pipes!) Sometimes when he has gotten in bed with us in the middle of the night, I don't even realize till I wake up that a little of that bed time vomit has gotten on my bed, pajamas, and pillow too. Oh how I love those morning showers. I feel for you right now Rebecca!
I am serious when I tell you that had anyone told me how I would freak when my boy got sick, I wouldn't have had one. I can't BEAR it.
Poor poor nephew boy. And you. I would have just shut the door forever and moved out. I'd have forfited the deposit....
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what a pain to put links on these here comments. What it meant to say is that I think you love ...
so, all the temptations that arose from holding a newborn this weekend are officially replaced by nausea and gagging. no kids. notever.
also...new high reached with your artwork, never has a paintdoc made me puke a little in my mouth. you are incredible on so many levels.
ah yep. Technicolor ALL OVER the little miss household for the past five days. WHEN WILL IT END?!
But I must admit, I'm kind of impressed--spewing from the top bunk?!
Why is it that kids (and adults) insist on barfing all over the floor when they could just barf in the bed, making for much easier clean-up?
I KNOW it's easier to just throw the sheets in the wash than to scrub the carpet. Yet every time I've felt that awful feeling and get that yucky taste in my mouth, I automatically lean over the side of the bed and puke on the new carpet. WHY WHY WHY?
I just came across your site through Kristi White, via the Davis family. I've been lurking for a couple of weeks and love reading your posts.
I can't identify which malady I can sadly relate to the most-the miserable puky pregnancy or the puky child, once hatched. My daughter sleepwalks, so I have been the recipient of her gobbly-gook, a gross bedside service. She doesn't even charge extra for hitting the stack of books next to my bed.
I hope your little one feels better soon.
eeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...
we almost had the same identical first pregnancy's...how whacky is that.
hope boy child is better and girl child doesn't follow in pursuit.
Yeah, I am guessing that I was that child. I know when I got a little older I was a . . . gusher. Thankfully, I usually made it to the window, man that hydranga was green.
BTW - Make sure that you don't actually let him know the full extent of your displeasure; he may just start trying to hide it.
I have to stick up for Micky here. He dropped out and did the boxing thang for a few years, remember? that's what the face is about. AND GOOOOO Trevon!
I love this story.. it gives me wonderful images of what I have to look forward to.
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