alfred hitchcock would be so proud
A few years back, I decided to hang a bird feeder outside my kitchen window. I had these visions of little bitty birdies chirping around and having a grand time eating the cute little seeds I bought, all for my viewing pleasure (well, therapy, if I’m honest).
So I bought a bird feeder and filled it all the way up with birdseed, and hung it up outside my kitchen window, and a couple birds came, and then it rained, and the bird feeder filled up with rain and it molded and filled with these creepy maggoty worm things, and I threw it away.
The next year, I thought it still seemed like a pretty good idea, so I bought a bird feeder and filled it all the way up with birdseed, and hung it up outside my kitchen window, and a couple birds came, and then it rained, and the bird feeder filled up with rain and it molded and filled with these creepy maggoty worm things, and I got super mad and left it there.
This year, I discovered these bird feeders that have mesh walls. Sweet! I hope whoever invented this kind of bird feeder has like a real whole lot of money from it or something. I figure, if it rains in it, it’ll dry out, and if it grows creepy maggoty worm things, the birds can stick their beaks in and just pick ‘em out (don’t make me sing you “circle of life”).
So I filled it all the way up with birdseed, and hooo-boy. Party time at rebecca marie’s house. The little bitty birdies came and had a blast. They eat like nobodies business. I would sit, and watch, and think how great I was for doing my part to keep the birds happy all winter long. Then, the big birdies started to come. And attack the little birds. I’m telling you. Swarm! Swarm! Swarm! For the most part, the little birds are intimidated by the big birds, and they just fly away as soon as they see the big birds coming, so I never worried much.
Until last weekend, that is. We were having a wee bit of an ice storm and the feeder was pretty ‘bout empty onaccountabecause as it turns out, birds are greedy, selfish, ingrates, so I got to filling it up. Would you like to know what I found on it? Blood. Yeah. That’s right. Blood. Lots of it. Splatters of it. It was frozen, onaccountabecause of the ice storm, but when I had the feeder in on the window sill so that I could fill it up, some of it melted, and it had that weird thin look to it, and I wiped it up (some got on my hand, no no no no no) and it had that not quite red, maybe a little bit orangey brown color.
Now, I’m paying closer attention to what’s happening. Apparently my house is Fight Club. Birds suck. They actually try to kill each other. I shoulda known when they were too stinkin’ uppity to eat the moldy food and creepy maggoty worms. Stupid jerk faces.
arrivederci, rebecca marie
So I bought a bird feeder and filled it all the way up with birdseed, and hung it up outside my kitchen window, and a couple birds came, and then it rained, and the bird feeder filled up with rain and it molded and filled with these creepy maggoty worm things, and I threw it away.
The next year, I thought it still seemed like a pretty good idea, so I bought a bird feeder and filled it all the way up with birdseed, and hung it up outside my kitchen window, and a couple birds came, and then it rained, and the bird feeder filled up with rain and it molded and filled with these creepy maggoty worm things, and I got super mad and left it there.
This year, I discovered these bird feeders that have mesh walls. Sweet! I hope whoever invented this kind of bird feeder has like a real whole lot of money from it or something. I figure, if it rains in it, it’ll dry out, and if it grows creepy maggoty worm things, the birds can stick their beaks in and just pick ‘em out (don’t make me sing you “circle of life”).
So I filled it all the way up with birdseed, and hooo-boy. Party time at rebecca marie’s house. The little bitty birdies came and had a blast. They eat like nobodies business. I would sit, and watch, and think how great I was for doing my part to keep the birds happy all winter long. Then, the big birdies started to come. And attack the little birds. I’m telling you. Swarm! Swarm! Swarm! For the most part, the little birds are intimidated by the big birds, and they just fly away as soon as they see the big birds coming, so I never worried much.
Until last weekend, that is. We were having a wee bit of an ice storm and the feeder was pretty ‘bout empty onaccountabecause as it turns out, birds are greedy, selfish, ingrates, so I got to filling it up. Would you like to know what I found on it? Blood. Yeah. That’s right. Blood. Lots of it. Splatters of it. It was frozen, onaccountabecause of the ice storm, but when I had the feeder in on the window sill so that I could fill it up, some of it melted, and it had that weird thin look to it, and I wiped it up (some got on my hand, no no no no no) and it had that not quite red, maybe a little bit orangey brown color.
Now, I’m paying closer attention to what’s happening. Apparently my house is Fight Club. Birds suck. They actually try to kill each other. I shoulda known when they were too stinkin’ uppity to eat the moldy food and creepy maggoty worms. Stupid jerk faces.
arrivederci, rebecca marie
proclaimed by rebecca marie at 11:40 AM
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